[Joke] Why India never gets to launch a nuclear missile

I got this as a forward mail. This should be strictly taken as a joke.
During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile, Soviet Satellites would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than 45 seconds Soviet counter-missiles would be on their way.

I got this as a forward mail. This should be strictly taken as a joke.

During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile, Soviet Satellites would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than 45 seconds Soviet counter-missiles would be on their way.

Recent studies commissioned by US department of Defenseincluded one on nuclear war between India and Pakistan :

This was the scenario….
The Pakistan army decides to launch a nuke-missile towards India .
They don’t need any permission from their government, and promptly order the countdowns.
Indian technology is highly advanced.
In less than 8 seconds, Indian army detects the Pak countdown and decides to launch a missile in retribution.
But they need permission from the Government of India .
They submit their request to the Indian President.
The President forwards it to the Cabinet.
The Prime Minister calls an emergency Lok Sabha session.
The LS meets, but due to several walkouts and severe protests by the opposition, it gets adjourned indefinitely.
The President asks for a quick decision.
In the mean time, the Pak missile failed to take off due to technical failure.
Their attempts for a re-launch are still on.
Just then the Indian ruling party is reduced to a minority because a party that was giving outside support withdraws it.
The President asks the PM to prove his majority within a week.
As the ruling party fails to win the confidence vote, a caretaker government is installed.
The caretaker PM decides to permit the armed forces to launch a nuclear missile.
But the Election Commission says that a caretaker government cannot take such a decision because elections are at hand.
The Election Commission files Public Interest Litigation in the Supreme Court alleging misuse of power.
The Supreme Court comes to the rescue of the PM, and says the acting PM is authorized to take this decision in view of the emergency facing the nation.
Just then one of the Pak missiles successfully took off, but it fell 367 miles away from the target, on its own government building in Islamabad at 11.00AM.
Fortunately there were no casualties as no employee had reached the office that early.
In any case, the nuclear core of the missile had detached somewhere in flight.
The Pakistan army is now trying to get better technologies from China and USA .
The Indian Government, taking no chances, decides to launch a nuclear missile of its own, after convening an all-party meeting.
This time all the parties agree.



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